29 Oct 2009

All of the sudden work has picked up again and I'm lagging behind on The Edit. It's annoying.

Somebody send me some writer's words of wisdom...

on quitting

I've been thinking a lot lately about quitting. Not me, quitting, I mean about the concept of quitting writing in general. It seems to be very common with the writers I know to at some point throw up one's hands and declare they're going to quit. I myself have done so, elsewhere in this blog. It seems to happen to others shortly after one too many rejection slips from publishers and/or agents. It happens to me when I read back over a bad day's work.

However, the next day, there I am again, writing something. So I tried to imagine what 'quitting writing' would look like, and I realized that it just doesn't make any sense. I mean, I can see never submitting anything again for publication, but actually ceasing to put my thoughts into words and the words onto 'paper' (apologies to this virtual location) -- for me, that seems about as possible as stopping my hair from growing. Does not make sense. Does not compute.

I guess I should admit up front that I never 'started' writing -- that is, as soon as my hands were developed enough to hold an implement, I was making marks on things, which gradually turned to words, which gradually became 'writing.' How do you 'quit' that? It would be like un-learning to read, as far as I'm concerned.

When I was in art school about a million years ago, there was an infamous list of questions from the sculptor David Smith that everybody thought was The Shit. We all went around trying to out-do each other with how Committed we were to Our Art. I will bet any amount of money that the most 'committed' of those students is now a celebutante or reality show star, without a thought for His or Her Art, because it's really just so much self-aggrandizing bullshit to say 'art is my life.' I'm talking about something smaller here -- something much simpler. Putting things into words on paper gives me pleasure, so I do it frequently. I can't envision anything that would make me stop doing that, not because 'it's my life' or something equally dramatic, but for the simple fact that I like doing it. I do hope to be published (hopefully within the next six years), but lack of publication won't make me stop writing any more than lack of a movie contract will make me stop talking.

However, I've been told, by people who know me well enough to say it, that I tend to erroneously assume other people are all exactly like me. So I'm curious: if there's anything in the world that would make you stop writing (as opposed to 'writing'), what is it? How do you think it would affect you, if you were to stop?

thrilling post #564

I think I've finally figured out Facebook. When I first went on the site, it was baffling. It's called a 'social networking' site, so I figured there would be conversations going on, chats and such -- you know, interaction. Now I realize that it's not really an interactive site, it's more like a giant bulletin board where everybody puts stuff for other people to read and/or look at, and comment on. In other words, I kept trying to get people to have a dialog with me on FB, and it's not meant to work that way. It's a giant self-promotion site. You write down what you're thinking. You comment on other peoples' thoughts. You interview yourself. You 'update your status.' It's really strange for those of us who are interactive by nature. We're not used to just putting stuff out there. We're used to having conversations.

In other news, I've decided that the draft I finished a couple of weeks ago is NOT really rewrite number 2, as I called it, but is, in fact, the First Draft; the First Finished Draft. Maybe it doesn't matter to anybody else, but I think I was trying to make myself believe I'd done more than I really have. Wanting to sound more experienced at this book-writing business than I really am. The truth is, this is the First Finished Draft of my First Book, and god damn it, I'm proud of it.

So now I'm doing my First Edit of the First Finished Draft of my First Book. When I'm Rich and Famous (tm) y'all can all say you were there. It's actually going along pretty well. I figure if I can do seven pages a day on the thing, I'll have the First Edit complete by December 1st. At that point, I think I'll be ready for readers. Need to start lobbying the writers I know. If you're interested, by all means shoot me an email.

harmonica convention

A curious confluence of occurrences:

1) Work has slowed down, and so I've been going through my files and posting my old poetry and stories here. Most of these are from my teens and early twenties, before my myelin sheath was fully formed, and it's a trip to remember what life felt like to me, back then. The Spouse jokes about how sensitive I am; if he'd met me twenty years ago, he'd have run screaming for the nearest exit. EVERYTHING affected me, deeply. I kind of miss it, from a writing standpoint, because even though these old pieces are somewhat schlocky in places, I think I was a better writer then.

2) Watching a series on American Craft on PBS last night, one of the subjects talked about how important the teens and twenties are in the development of most artists. I can't quote what s/he said word for word, but it was something along the lines of 'most artists end up doing what they did in their late teens and early twenties as their life's work.' Which struck me, because I'd just been going through what I was doing in my teens and twenties, which was writing. Later, I tried on other creative pursuits -- theater, visual arts, music -- but none of them took. Writing seems to have stuck.

There's something strange and wonderful about being inspired by my younger self. I'll be curious to see what this does to rewrite #3 of The Book.

rant #479

Can somebody please explain to me how health insurance became the widely accepted solution to the U.S. health care crisis? Even people who acknowledge that the current system (which was created by health insurance companies, by the way) is broken are swallowing the argument that if everybody has health insurance, nobody will be denied care when they need it.

How is that supposed to work? Health insurance companies make money by denying care. As long as there is a buck to be made off it, somebody somewhere is going to be denied coverage for something they need. Mandating that everybody give these criminals money, instead of just those of us who can afford it, will not fix the problem.

What WILL fix the problem is not-for-profit health care. Call it a public option, call it socialized medicine, call it communism, I don't care -- just get it in the damned bill. Call it Patriotic Anti-Terrorist Health Care for Christ if you have to. Until the profit motive is removed from the control of people who are paying for our health care, our problems will persist. They must persist, because that is how the current system sustains itself.

suspended animation

I'm feeling oddly at loose ends... I'm so used to writing every day that it feels weird not to. I worked on Book 2 last night, the one that nearly derailed me from Book 1 not too long ago -- not seriously, just fooled around with it -- and I'm not so sure about it now. I like the basic concept, which is to set a murder mystery in an era that I've not seen many murder mysteries set in, but I don't know if that's enough to justify it's existence. It may be that the next project is to continue Julia's adventures in becoming a P.I., and let the historical era piece rest a little longer.

10/3/2009 5:16 PM

The second re-write (that's what I'm officially calling it) is done. It's printing right now.

72,104 words. Still a lot of work to do, but oh how I love that feeling of getting successfully to THE END!

lights and tunnels

Too distracted by the possibility of getting a public healthcare option to write.

I kid. I'm just having a hard time here at the end. Part of me doesn't really want to 'finish' the manuscript, because I've had so much fun writing it. It won't really be 'finished,' in that I will still be polishing/revising/editing for quite a while, but the storyline will be complete, and there's something a little bit sad about it for me for some reason.

I'm also considering trying a short story to cleanse my palate before I start the full polish/revise/edit -- I've never been a short anything person, I prefer things that give me maximum payback for my investment, but who knows. I did write a lot of poetry in my twenties and thirties.

OH, I just had a brainstorm. I could post some of my poetry here, couldn't I? Maybe I will.